Love is something that always found its home in my mind somewhere between mystery and misunderstanding. Especially concerning loving myself. I went through phases of being enamored with this idea of story book love. Other phases consisted of wanting nothing to do with it. Being convinced all it did was amplify hurt.
The turning point came when I head towards the amber shaded light at the end of the tunnel. When I came out of the other side, I was welcomed into a brand new world. A world shaped by a brand new understanding of what it means to love, and how to actually love others.
The very first thing I had to re-learn about love was that I had to love myself first. As cliche as the task may be, it was the most important step in erecting a new understanding from the ground up. I had to understand that loving myself is a fluid journey with no destination, only branching paths. It was about moving with the wind of my emotions, but controlling the sail. A sometimes rocky journey, met with beautiful scenery, if only I know where to focus my looking glass.
My wife taught me to love myself, because she was able to acknowledge and break through every single one of my insecurities, and show me that every aspect of myself was loved. This leads into the topic of how to love others.
How to Love Others
Once I began to recognize that I was actually being revitalized, refreshed and reconstructed through Actual, Pure love, I began to understand what it meant to actually love another person.
Loving another person is first and foremost about acceptance. Acknowledge and accept all factors that work together to create the person. You must love their entity as one. You cannot fall into the trap of loving aspects or pieces of a person. It is not a truthful connection. You may particularly “like” every aspect of the person in question, but you owe them the respect of aknowleging and accepting them.
Love and relationships as a whole are fluid. Altering as the container tranforms. Fitting to whatever shape it becomes. You are capable of love no matter what shape you become. Through every decision, lifestyle change, social interaction… Please remember you are capable of love.